what do I want to do with mending?????????

*repairing
*what can be repaired?
->relationships with people or things
->physically broken things
*what do I have to repair?
->inner struggles like problems with organization/chaos
->relationships with other people/family members
->relationship with painting

things I know:
- I really want to paint
- I really want to enjoy and embrace my chaos
- kind of want to take this corona time to take time to rediscover new ways of working
- I like the more metaphorical approach of the word mending, but I would like to work with stitching / textile as well
- I also want to work with bodies/relationships to our bodies/mending the damage done by society


--> juist going to create with the concept of 'mending' in the back of my mind

25/04/2020 UPDATE:
While walking through the supermarket I saw a magazine called 'VROUW' (WOMAN) with an article (translated) 'HILARIOUS! Woman with their gay best friend' and I was so shocked about how problematic this was that I bought the magazine and I'm going to mend it. Hold up.... let me get my scissors and cut the word gay off in this sentence. It's JUST their BEST FRIEND WHO CARES IF HE'S GAY????????????????????????????????????????????????????? OR DOES SHE HAVE AN OTHER BEST FRIEND THAT'S MORE OF A BEST FRIEND BECAUSE THE PERSON IS HETEROSEXUAL AND DESERVES ANOTHER TITLE??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

26/04/2020 Update II:
The magazine was actually full of bullshit based around men and female gendernormative constructs. I want to MEND this!

29/04/2020 another thought:
some day I want to make a little booklet full of 'daily cultural appropriations', because I see a lot of my friends using things from other cultures without knowing about it. Think about eyebrow slits, 'YASSSS QUEEN' or cornrows for example. I want to make a sort of neutral non judging guide for people my age to read about the background and history of what they're doing. But idk if it's my (Dutch white heterosexual cis) right to do so. If I want to do it I have to be really careful and not make it about me and my opinion, but just passing on what I have learnt over the years. I think for now I want to mend something within feminism and the magazine I read, but this may be another cool way of mending something I think is wrong or broken in the society we live in.

30/04/2020:
I have to make a decision about what I want to mend. I want to work with textile but also with painting, but I can experiment with the mediums as I go and I don't want to fixate too much right now. for the subject im going to choose for the magazine, I want to mend a few things considering how women portray women and the (self)destructive things they say about each other. I get that the texts they write are sensational, or easy to read or that it may seem innocent, but the message they bring across is very very sad. one article (written by a man) said that women and men relationships are very different but that 'YOu CAn ACtuAllY hAvE a FemALe-MaN RelIaTIonShIp WiTHoUt SeX!???!!!!!'. It said that women only discuss problems and they don't spare anyone when they gossip, not EVEN their husbands, and that men just talk about football and barbecuing. My first reaction was that if women have problems that they can't discuss with their partners and they have to discuss it with their friends, there is something wrong in the relationship and that it's only a very good thing that they can talk about it with their friends. I was so angry...
Idk how to mend this yet. There is an artist who embroidered mysoginist rap lyrics on old fashioned underwear, to illustrate how old fashioned these thoughts and ideas are. I maybe want to do something like that, but I'll have to experiment a little bit and run my mind over it a few times.